Mother's Day can be hard! With all the busyness of life, hopeful expectations, and any other grief we may be carrying, a day that is meant for celebration can become painful. This week I was sorting through my feelings about the day. Trying to set healthy expectations for myself and others, during a very busy time of year for us farmers. 

Here's what I noticed

1. There were a few things I needed to let go of. Things I needed to give myself space to grieve. And there were fears that I needed to shake off. 

2. There were things I needed to ask for. I took time to think about what I actually wanted for this weekend and express those desires. (I plan to take my mom to the greenhouse on Saturday and then we plan to go to the lake on Sunday, it's supposed to be beautiful!)

3. I needed to give myself permission to have joy in this season. This was something I didn't even realize until something beautiful happened You may think this is a coincidence, but I would call it a gift from my  Heavenly Father. TWO days in a row, two separate people prayed for me and both shared the image of a duck shaking off water. Have you ever seen this? It's truly one of the cutest things ever. They shake their little tails and the water flies off in every direction. I don't think there's a person alive who can see this and not feel JOY in their heart.  

For me this image is two-fold. 

First, shaking off the fear. I'm discovering that all the most painful things in life are rooted in fear. 

Second, embracing joy. I don't think we can hold joy and fear at the same time. We have to let go of the fear before we can hold the joy. When I heard that prayer yesterday, it struck me that this prayer was a gift from God, for me. And if you are reading this, it's for you too. Be blessed this Mother's Day, my friend <3 

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Meet Katherine Joy

 
 Not that long ago I was a worn out & overwhelmed mom of two.

When  I had become pregnant with my second child I knew I felt off and at times I felt crazy. I was  irritable, bi*** y, and at times downright nasty.  Frustration and rage would bubble up out of me. I felt like  I was failing in every way. I felt like there was no one to talk to . I was afraid of the person I had become. I would beg my husband to stay home from work because there were days when I didn't trust myself to be alone with our kids. 

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